Daly Focus Blog
Dad, don’t let your teenage daughter fool you.
She needs you.
I know her attitude may not always reflect that, but it’s true. She’s caught in a whirlwind of uncertainty, hormones, and confusing messages that skew her sense of identity and self-worth. On top of that, her social world is topsy-turvy, and she’s growing, changing, and feeling awkward. With you. With everybody.
Along the way, you’ll be tempted to disengage from her and keep her at arm’s length.
I’m a well-organized person. I like things neat and tidy. Generally, that quality leads to positive results in my life. But it can also lead to dashed expectations and conflict. Clutter around the house can really bother me, if I let it.
So can clutter in my schedule. My leadership team here at Focus on the Family helps me manage my time well, but my life is full, and I always have more to do than I have time to do it.
I refused to go to kindergarten.
On my first day, I dug in my heels and wouldn’t walk to school with my siblings. I told my mom no and meant it. I was so stubborn about it that she personally had to usher me down the block and into the building.
I didn’t want to go, but I’m glad I did because something magical happened that first morning.
Her name was Mrs. Smith. My kindergarten teacher.
Young people in America and Europe are leaving the Christian church at an unprecedented rate. Statistically, this generation is the least religious in history. Teenagers, in particular, are turning toward atheism at a rate double that of the general population.
Many struggle to believe claims made by the Bible. Or to reconcile faith in a loving God with evil and suffering in the world. Some cite bad experiences with a church or conflict with a Christian as their reason for doubt.
From the “strange but true” file comes this unusual story of selfish entitlement.
Twenty-seven-year-old Raphael Samuel filed a lawsuit against his parents because – get this – they didn’t seek his permission before giving birth to him. Because of that oversight, he said, his parents were obligated to pay his expenses for the rest of his life.
Talk about selfishness run amuck. Instead of feeling gratitude for everything his parents did to sacrifice and give him a good life, Raphael chose what has become a common attitude – entitlement.
Now that my boys are grown, I’m looking back at that part of life as a wonderful time. I really loved being a dad. Sure, there were challenging moments, but the rewards of parenting have always far outweighed the difficulties. In fact, a lot of our memories were joyous. Many were centered around laughter.
It’s important for families to keep a sense of humor and laugh with each other.
In that spirit, I have some fun stories for you to hear on our Focus on the Family Broadcast “Parenting Struggles and What They Teach.”
Our guest, author Ken Swarner, is throwing his family under the bus … with their permission, of course.
Author Rhonda Stoppe thought she was prepared to be a great mom … until she gave birth to her second child, a son. Rhonda felt inadequate to be his mother. Raising a daughter felt easy. Raising a son felt intimidating.
Many moms can relate. They understand how their daughters think, feel, and see the world. Not so their sons. My wife, Jean, did an amazing job of adapting to our two boys and creating a meaningful connection with both, but she worked hard it.
Would you like to see more joyful obedience from your children?
Author Arlene Pellicane offers eight key strategies that will set your kids up to succeed:
Amusement is not the highest priority. Your life should not revolve around entertaining your child.
Parents call the shots. You are the leader, not your child.
Routine and boundaries provide security. Kids thrive with guidelines and guardrails.
It’s best to weave the Bible and prayer into the fabric of daily life, not reserve it for Sundays.
If you’re the parent of young children, maybe you’ll relate to this scenario.
Amy Davison’s children were watching a cartoon about a girl who had a crush on one of her classmates. Throughout the episode, she put love notes in the classmate’s locker. At the end, when the show revealed that the locker belonged to another girl, Amy’s ten-year-old daughter turned and asked, “Wait, what just happened? Does she like girls?”
And just like that, Amy was forced to have a conversation with her young child about the LGBT world.
I’ve known a lot of guys who think nurturing children is mom’s job, not dad’s. Fatherhood should be about strength, they say.
I agree, but instead of picturing a bouquet of flowers, picture a mighty oak tree. It’s the tree’s strength that allows it to provide and protect and nurture the wildlife around it.
That’s fatherhood. Nurturing dads have strong character, but a gentle spirit that enables them to handle discipline issues without criticizing or being harsh.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
