Daly Focus Blog
Some adult men and women feel called to singleness. They live alone, but not in isolation. They enjoy deeply connected friendships, and they value the opportunities for service and adventure that being single affords them.
But a lot of adults hope their singleness is only a temporary season of life. They yearn and even pray for marriage. But, for many, the journey to find a mate has not panned out quite the way they expected.
Where do you go to meet quality people?
When you walked down the aisle, what was your vision for you and your spouse? Did you want a “nice” marriage? A “friendly” marriage? A “we get along” marriage?
Probably not.
Most couples are searching for intimacy, connection, romance, and excitement. But years into their marriage, many husbands and wives are bored. Life has settled into a routine – a rut, really – and they’re not connecting like they once did.
If you’ve reached that place in your marriage, you might be thinking, “This isn’t what I had in mind.”
Well, that’s not what the Bible says God has in mind for you, either.
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If you’re a parent of a biological child, you’ll never forget the first moment you saw your little one on an ultrasound image.
It’s the ultimate look within. Today’s expectant parents can see what tens of billions of couples throughout history never did – 3-D images of their preborn baby moving around inside the womb.
Technology is a way of life for kids. They use it for everything from simple communication with family and friends to entertainment to school-related tasks.
And the numbers prove it. In the course of just one minute, YouTube users upload 48 hours of new video content. Facebook users share over 680,000 pieces of content. More than 2 million Google searches occur. And over 200 million email messages are sent. And did you know teenagers send on average over 3,000 texts every month?
I’ve previously shared how parents can pass along a lasting faith to their kids. In a nutshell, there are two things parents should do:
Live out an authentic, vibrant faith themselves
Help their children develop spiritual habits, like regular prayer and Scripture reading
But as times change and technology brings us increased convenience, I’ve wondered if an unintended consequence is that, in some areas, our digital life could potentially undermine our efforts to model the faith?
Vince Lombardi was the legendary football coach of the Green Bay Packers. Throughout the 1960s, his teams dominated the National Football League. But their astounding success was not the result of new and innovative ways to play the game. It was quite the opposite.
In fact, one notorious example demonstrates how adamant Coach Lombardi was that his players master the fundamentals. At the beginning of training camp the year after one of the team’s most successful seasons, Lombardi gathered his men for a pep talk.
What would you say if I suggested that on this Valentine’s Day, you celebrate your “average” marriage?
It doesn’t sound too romantic, does it?
The suggestion certainly goes against the Hollywood notion of love, with its exaggerated portrayals of couples blissfully, breathlessly enraptured with each other.
But let’s get real here.
Real life isn’t like a jewelry ad in a magazine where everything looks picture-perfect. It’s not as exciting as the song on the radio praising the thrill of a brand-new relationship.
Unfortunately, even good parents might one day see their adult children make poor choices. Here at Focus we’ve spoken with many heartbroken moms and dads who are grappling to understand and respond well to their grown kids’ decisions.
Here are four tips from our counselors on how parents can help their child get back on track.
1. Ease your guilt.
Every parent makes mistakes. However, as an adult, your son or daughter is now old enough to make their own choices and to take responsibility for them.
Let’s be honest: Parenting isn’t for the weak – especially when you’re raising a strong-willed child.
It’s not fun when a pint-sized little one defiantly refuses to obey or when a 14-year-old talks back. Our natural instincts want to kick in. It’s all too easy to respond in anger.
My wife, Jean, and I know this well. We have two teenage boys, and one of them is a strong-willed child. It’s interesting to look back over the years and see how he’s impacted Jean and me in different ways.
I’ve got a riddle for you. “You can spend it, but you can’t keep it. And once you’ve lost it, you can never get it back.” Do you know what it is? Here’s a clue:
Let’s say you win a contest. The grand prize is $86,400 wired into your bank account each day at midnight. The money is yours to spend however you want. There’s just one catch. At the end of the day, every penny you don’t spend disappears from your account.
Jim Daly is a husband, father and President of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. His blog, Daly Focus, is full of timely commentary and wisdom designed to help you navigate and understand today’s culture. His latest book is Marriage Done Right.
