Family and Home Archives

Seven Predictors of Divorce

I last shared Dr. Gottman’s six predictors of marital success and happiness. Here now are his top warning signs of coming marital strife:

1. Harsh Start of Arguments

The partner who starts the argument is aggressive or hostile, is insulting, attacks his partner’s character, uses sarcasm, shows contempt or disgust—all of which lead to escalation or withdrawal.

2. Criticism

Attacking character or traits, instead of addressing the problem specifically.

3. Contempt

Disgust, disrespect, condescension, sarcasm, eye-rolling.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: divorce, marriage, relationships August 12, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Six Predictors of Marital Success and Happiness

How’s your marriage?

According to Dr. John Gottman, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder of the Gottman Relationship Institute, there are several things to consider when gauging the health of your marriage.

Here they are:

1. High Levels of Friendship, Respect, Affection, and Humor

This is defined as liking each other, being each other’s best friend, doing things together; showing interest in and respect for the other’s thoughts and feelings, avoiding put-downs, supporting each other’s goals and aspirations, feeling affection for each other, having fun and laughter together, being Number One in each other’s eyes.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: relationships August 10, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

A Family Update

Some of you may have heard or read about Focus on the Family reducing its budget by $27 million for the upcoming year. Of course, we’re hardly alone. Nearly every ministry, organization and corporation in America has been forced to deal squarely with today’s challenging economic times.

In order to balance the books, we’ve trimmed 13% of our staff, which means we’ll be saying good-bye to 110 of our friends and colleagues in these coming days and weeks.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: faith, finances, staff August 3, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

When Good Inventions Go Bad

It’s a product of the fallen nature of man:

Anything and everything that was created for good, from medicine to technology, will eventually be corrupted for ill purposes.
A recent case in point: A new “video conferencing” feature made exclusively for Apple’s iPhone. It’s called FaceTime. Here is how the company is promoting it:

People have been dreaming about video calling for decades. iPhone 4 makes it a reality. With the tap of a button, you can wave hello to your kids, share a smile from across the globe, or watch your best friend laugh at your stories — iPhone 4 to iPhone 4 over Wi-Fi.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: faith, sex, technology July 30, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Arguing Happily Ever After

Somebody once said there are two types of married couples – those who argue (from time to time) and those who lie and say they don’t.

There was an interesting article in yesterday’s Wall Street Journal that suggests it’s not if we argue, but how we argue that will determine the overall health of our marriages.

All couples disagree – it’s how they disagree that makes the difference,” reports Howard Markman, professor of psychology at the University of Denver and co-director of the Center for Marital and Family Studies.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: husband, marriage, wife July 28, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Bigotry and Marriage

Frank Rich is a long-time columnist for The New York Times. As a former drama critic, he’s no stranger to the stage and certainly knows how to stir the pot. He once referred to the Passion of the Christ film as “a porn movie, replete with slo-mo climaxes and pounding music for the money shots.”

Mr. Rich has been a frequent critic of evangelical Christianity. Focus on the Family has born the brunt of his sharp pen several times, but as an opinion columnist, he gets paid to share his perspective, and that’s part of what makes America great.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: homosexuality, marriage July 22, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Life Saving Pizza???

George Linn might very well be alive today because he ordered a pizza.

This past Friday the Lakewood, Colorado man was awaiting delivery of a pie when he suffered a heart attack. His wife, Kami, was about to call 911 when Chris Wuebben, the pizza delivery man, showed up with their order.

Bad timing?

Hardly.

Mr. Wuebben had been a paramedic in Ilinois before moving to Colorado.

While Mrs. Linn called 911, Chris Wuebben administered CPR, stopping the heart attack.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: entertainment, faith, humor July 20, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Modern Day Miracles

I wrote last time about the media’s obsession with bad and sensational news. Sadly, the headlines are so often dominated by negative developments even though the world is full of beauty, wonder and yes, miracles. So much of life is based upon things unfolding behind the scenes outside our view. Our days, much more than we fully appreciate and acknowledge, are guided and controlled by God’s invisible hand.

In other words, what we see is not all there is.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: adoption, parenting July 13, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

It’s a Mad, Mad World

Has BP finally plugged the oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico? Did a federal judge really just overturn the federal Defense of Marriage Act? Is the stock market still on its wild roller coaster ride?

I’m only asking because the news media has appeared obsessed these last few days with only two main subjects:

LeBron James and Lindsay Lohan.

To be clear, I have nothing against either of these individuals.

I’m happy for Mr. James and saddened for Ms.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: entertainment, faith, pop culture July 9, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Back in the Saddle Again

It’s been nearly two weeks since my motorcycle accident, and I’m finally back at the office. The left ankle is in a cast and healing, though doctors tell me I’m still twelve weeks away from being able to put any pressure on the foot itself. Despite the pain and the awkwardness of getting around and having to prop the foot up on pillows, it’s good to be on campus again.

As the old saying goes, sometimes a change is better than a rest.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: family, staff July 7, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura