marriage Archives

How to Fight Fair

I am not a music aficionado by any measure, but somebody recently reminded me that it was the old British rock group, The Kinks, who once popularized the following lament:

Well I met a pretty girl, as pretty as can be
I thought she was my baby till she introduced to me
A great big tall fella, about six foot tall
I shivered and I shook, couldn’t do any more

‘Cause I’m a lover not a fighter…

It’s just a silly song, of course, but I think this idea, that lovers can’t be fighters, is, in many ways, a faulty concept that’s been culturally ingrained.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, marriage November 1, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

The Way to a Stronger Marriage

I’m headed to Atlanta this morning to participate in Focus on the Family’s Celebrate Family Tour. Tonight’s event is featuring the hilarious comedian, pastor and teacher, Mark Gungor. Mark is one of the most sought-after speakers on marriage and family in the country. If you’re in the area and would like to attend, please know we’d love to greet and host you this evening.

Before I go, though, I wanted to invite you to listen to today’s broadcast.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, husband, marriage, wife October 27, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Radio Changes Lives

I want to briefly share something exciting with you.

Each day, a team member here at Focus on the Family compiles what we internally refer to as a “Response Report” regarding the daily radio broadcast. Our phone representatives talk with thousands of listeners per day, and they record what people are thinking and saying about the day’s radio program. Some of the callers are blunt and don’t hesitate to criticize the program; still others might praise the very same one.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, family, marriage October 14, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Who is Wooing You?

It sounds like the opening line of a classic Dr. Seuss kid’s book, doesn’t it?

Who is wooing you?

When it comes to romantic relationships, I think there’s a tendency to see “wooing” as primarily a component of courtship prior to marriage. It’s a familiar scene, isn’t it? There is the boyfriend, flowers and chocolates in hand, maybe even leaving a little love note under his girlfriend’s windshield wiper at work. A colleague of mine, while dating his then girlfriend, now wife, would bring groceries to her apartment in between paychecks.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: broadcast, family, marriage, pop culture October 8, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Marriage is as Much a Responsibility as a Fundamental Right

The local newspaper usually reflects the heartbeat of the community.

Usually, though not always.

The Colorado Springs Gazette is our hometown publication. They do a great job covering our area despite the fact they have a shrinking staff of writers. Last week, the libertarian minded editorial board officially endorsed same-sex marriage. The editors graciously offered me an opportunity to respond in this past Sunday’s edition.

Here is the essay; I welcome your thoughts.

Marriage is as Much a Responsibility as a Fundamental Right

By Jim Daly

The Gazette’s recent endorsement of gay marriage makes the same mistakes on a number of issues that we’re accustomed to seeing from active proponents for the issue.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: homosexuality, kids, marriage August 16, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Seven Predictors of Divorce

I last shared Dr. Gottman’s six predictors of marital success and happiness. Here now are his top warning signs of coming marital strife:

1. Harsh Start of Arguments

The partner who starts the argument is aggressive or hostile, is insulting, attacks his partner’s character, uses sarcasm, shows contempt or disgust—all of which lead to escalation or withdrawal.

2. Criticism

Attacking character or traits, instead of addressing the problem specifically.

3. Contempt

Disgust, disrespect, condescension, sarcasm, eye-rolling.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: divorce, marriage, relationships August 12, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Why the Proposition 8 Decision Matters

U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker’s decision this past Wednesday nullifying the votes of 7 million Californians was, obviously, deeply troubling. The appeal process will be costly and lengthy, but those of us committed to marriage should be optimistic and hopeful. Our own analysts have carefully studied the ruling and fully expect the decision to be overturned upon appeal.

Nevertheless, you might be wondering why the Proposition 8 decision, an issue presumably only dealing with the state of California, should matter to every person in every state of the union.

Topics: Current Events Tags: homosexuality, marriage, policy August 6, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Arguing Happily Ever After

Somebody once said there are two types of married couples – those who argue (from time to time) and those who lie and say they don’t.

There was an interesting article in yesterday’s Wall Street Journal that suggests it’s not if we argue, but how we argue that will determine the overall health of our marriages.

All couples disagree – it’s how they disagree that makes the difference,” reports Howard Markman, professor of psychology at the University of Denver and co-director of the Center for Marital and Family Studies.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: husband, marriage, wife July 28, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

Bigotry and Marriage

Frank Rich is a long-time columnist for The New York Times. As a former drama critic, he’s no stranger to the stage and certainly knows how to stir the pot. He once referred to the Passion of the Christ film as “a porn movie, replete with slo-mo climaxes and pounding music for the money shots.”

Mr. Rich has been a frequent critic of evangelical Christianity. Focus on the Family has born the brunt of his sharp pen several times, but as an opinion columnist, he gets paid to share his perspective, and that’s part of what makes America great.

Topics: Family and Home Tags: homosexuality, marriage July 22, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura

One Father Too Many

The Obama administration is actively changing the cultural norms of our country. Equally troubling, the nation’s chief executive is doing so at the expense of our most vulnerable—the rising ranks of fatherless children.

I’m disappointed President Obama has marred an otherwise noble initiative designed to raise awareness of, and offer solutions for, father absence with a political tip of the cap to advocates of homosexual parenting.

This past Sunday, the 100th anniversary of Father’s Day, within the traditional White House proclamation, the president included a single incendiary sentence that not only undermines the unique and complementary roles of mothers and fathers, but also one which science simply does not support.

Topics: Current Events Tags: events, homosexuality, marriage June 23, 2010 by Jim Daly with Paul Batura